Our Sweet Family of SIX!

I love Jesus, but I curse a little.... Okay, y'all guys, that's a damn lie. I curse a LOT, like, ALL THE WORDS . I say them. Probably at least a few times a day, just ask my friend Rachael who can hear every breath I take over our shared wall in our gallery offices. I do love Jesus, that part is true. On Saturdays and Sundays, I curse even more, and I say "Jesus!" Sometimes, I am asking him to intervene. For instance, when the Razorbacks were down 21-zip, Stephen and I were sitting in Chili's getting our pregame on before the Texas Tech kickoff and after checking the Razorback score, I said, "Jesus". In my heart I was begging him to get into those Hogs and help 'em out. I mean, seriously, y'all guys, I thought it was bad then! And you know what else? I heart me some Gus Malzahn. I am on the Gus Bus, every game, rooting for Auburn except when they bend my Razorbacks over and spank the hell out of 'em! Shit. Sometimes, I am praising him...

Disclaimer: With all of the letters in all of the words, of every language known and unknown to man, I could never accurately describe the emotions I experienced on and around the events of 9/11/01. Tuesday, September 11, 2001, is a day that I will never forget, although; at times I would like to. I was a junior in high school and walking with a friend to our science class, when I saw the first glimpse of footage. She and I were on the dance team together and everyone referred to us as twins. In all reality, we both just had curly hair, green eyes, and spunky personalities in common. As we rounded the corner of the science wing of our school, I noticed that the class on the corner was watching a film. We passed the next two classes and I could see that they were all watching the same movie. I didn't think much of it, as they were freshmen classes and I knew that I would be studying something different that day in Physics II. We were gabbing and goofing off about the cute guy...

Y'all guyz. Holy wow. So today, I was browsing my memory thing on Facebook and it showed me some photos of myself 4 years ago. Did you know me then? You didn't. I mean, the girl you think you may have known then, she wasn't real.  I can guarantee that even my closest friends and family members didn't know me then. You knew the person that I allowed people to see, but no one knew me. I was too ashamed to allow anyone to see who I truly was and what I was enduring. So much has changed in four years. It feels like a blink of an eye and an eternity all at the same time. First and foremost, selfie filters y'all. Wow. Thank the lawd-y sweet baby Jesus for those! For the real though, I'm not the same person. I'm whole now. I am an entirely different person and just like Popeye, I'm proud of who I am. I know how to switch utilities from one address to another, and how to check my oil. I know how to say 'no' without fear, and how to say 'yes...

You know, I've been thinking, "I do a lot of rambling, venting, bitching, etc on my blog, I probably don't post enough about our beautiful family on Facebook, I really hope folks realize it's because we are just too damn busy enjoying our wonderful life." So I decided to share with you a glimpse of the joy that is my life, the reasons I can deal with all the bullshit, the purposes for putting on a good attitude, adulting, and the like. I'm going to start with my one and only. He is a spunky, handsome, funny, crazy, caring guy. He is the spirit of our family. He is wild, beautiful, and sweet spirited. He is forgetful, creative, and ADD like his mother. He one of the most courageous, protective, encouraging people I know, and I'm proud to call him my son. Jace is one hell of a man, and he is only 9 years old. He keeps us laughing with his random and witty sense of humor, but inside, if you look very closely, he has the most tender and simultaneously pro...

My ex husband plays this super fun game, and I'm so excited tell you about it. I'm currently at gymnastics with one of the twincesses and I'm so bad mom-ing right this second because I'm writing this post. But you know, I think it's okay. I mean, I bring her every week, and I watch her every week. So. Back to this fun game... Wait. You know that time when you were a kid, or in my case, all those times , when your momma told you "If you don't have anything nice to say, keep your mouth shut!"? Recently, I read something similar in a book that said, "If you don't have anything nice to say, take a big bite and chew slow" so I've really been meaning to buy a package of ding dongs to keep in my purse but I've yet to do that...  So this game. Are you excited? I'm uber excited to tell you about it because it's so damn much fun. Like, really excited!!! Can you feel my excitement to share radiating through my words yet? Did you w...

I've noticed this trending hashtag, and it makes my heart glad that people are speaking out, and standing up, so here's my two pennies. I can honestly say that I was an adult before I was aware of abuse in forms other than physical. I read a few books in my early twenties that condoned domestic abuse, and made statements to the effect of a woman's place being to stay by her husband no matter what, pray harder, try harder, eventually your abuser will change, and if not, then you have been a servant to the Lord. I won't get into my honest opinions of that philosophy, but abuse is abuse. Abuse comes in many forms. Abusers come in all forms, races, religions, and genders. Maybe he doesn't/hasn't/won't ever put his hands on you, but if he belittles you, calls you names, dictates what you can or can't do, what you can wear, who you can talk to, controlling or manipulating you to the point that you are removed from all other relationships/friendshi...

So, here we are, just about a week later... guess what....I'M STILL WRITING!! I have hit my goal for the week and then some, so apparently, I am finally writing what I should have been writing long ago. And you know what else? I think I have a trilogy on my hands. Yep. Pretty sure I have three books in my head, pouring out into a word document. I don't know if I'll ever get published, or if I will ever share my entire books, but I have also come to realize that I am doing this for me. It is cathartic, and I have so needed to be writing about the right things. I still have random thoughts, and things I want to blurt out, which I plan to share right here. I'm currently working on posts about compassion, liberals, stepmothers, and a trailer park, just to keep things interesting around here! I'd really like to transition this blog to focus on our blended family, but we shall see if I really get there or not :)  I've got about 750 things to do, so I had bette...

I'm doing it this time. It's gonna happen. For real. I am not even kidding. I am making a First Quarter Resolution, you know, it has to be a little different because my left-brained self can't just jump in with the usual New Year's Resolution. Plus, reality. I can't commit to an entire year, I just can't. Heck, I can barely commit to my monthly dinner menu, and even with that I switch stuff around. I have to; I'm currently on night two of two this week that I have changed the dinner menu. HA! My poor husband. I'm so lucky that he finds me charming in the midst of my creative, wild, unpredictable, emotional, hot southern mess sundae self! Can I coin that? Hot Southern Mess Sundae. It's a thing now, let's make it happen! Are you still reading? Does it make you crazy how I let my mind wander in about a thousand different directions at a time? At least once a week, Stephen and I will be having a conversation and then I will jump in with some enti...

I think we would have been good friends, you and I. I would have enjoyed giving you hell about 'America's Team' and Tony Romo, even though your son has taught me to love and respect them. We would have watched football games, drinking beer and smoking cigarettes. I'm sure you would have teased me about being so uptight and anxious about the kids running around the house before dinners, cookouts, or during games. I wish I had gotten the chance to know you, Gary Sugar. In the last two years I have learned so many amazing facts about you. Most importantly, you were victorious. You were brave, courageous, selfless and stubborn. You raised two incredible men. “Carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. A legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you.”  ―  Shannon L. Alder You are missed. deeply. It's hard for me to even consider publishing those words, because I know that they don't even begin to convey the depth that you are l...